Q:  I struggle to find ways to add value to my contacts/network/village.  What are some other ways to build the Emotional Bank Account?

A:  I see my village as three circles, each one a bit smaller than the other with different levels of EBA deposits required for each.  The largest circle is the network to which I contribute in a largely electronic fashion.  The middle-sized circle are colleagues or friends that I have met face-to-face and probably talk to occasionally or meet for lunch.  The smallest circle are my most trusted friends, family, and colleagues.  Each circle of the village requires different activities.  I contribute to my large social network by posting and answering questions and passing on information that will be useful to an individual or group of people.  Just today, on the Organizational Change Practitioners group on LinkedIn I responded to a request for a change activity for large groups.  It started a conversation with Hanna, the woman who posted the question.  I also contributed to a conversation on the Sales Executive Council Peer Roundtable regarding the Inside Sales function.  By contributing to the small number of groups I belong to, I build relationships and build my reputation without investing more than 30 minutes/week. 

For the middle sized circle, I receive weekly updates regarding changes to my LinkedIn contacts and send congratulatory e-mails regarding promotions or updates.  I make a point to e-mail the individual with a funny story, a quick update, or some news that applies to their career or organization at least a few times a year. My birthday was last week and I received a lot of e-cards and quick e-mails from people who must have received an update from a social networking site.  I also send hand written thank you notes.

The inner circle receives the most investment of time because I do all of the above plus ask for and provide mentoring, act as a professional sounding board, set aside time for conversations and lunch or dinner when I’m in the same city and even work on projects to assist them with their great careers.  It sounds like a lot, but I know that I don’t invest more than  2 hours/week in networking.  And it provides a tremendous payoff—emotionally as well as career-wise.  To quote the Beatles, “The love you take is equal to the love you make.” (in building your network/village).

What have you found helpful as you build emotional bank accounts with your networks? I would love to hear from you.

Author: Jennifer Colosimo, Chief Learning Officer at FranklinCovey

You can also follow Jennifer on Twitter at: http://twitter.com/jencolosimo

We know that being out of work can have a troubling impact on families. The stress, worry and pressure often impact a person’s ability to be the spouse or parent they want to be. Communication might break down. Quarrels might increase. Family members might feel neglected, scared or withdrawn.

In these kinds of situations, I have always counseled people to focus on those who are the most important in their lives and what matters most. Yes, being out of a job might have you in a crisis, but isn’t your family your most precious possession? So what can we do to strengthen our families in good times or in times of trouble?

•  Write a family mission statement-identify what kind of family you want to be, what qualities define your family, what kinds of feeling do you want in your home, how do you want to build relationships? Check out the FranklinCovey Family Mission Statement Builder to help you create yours.
• Hold weekly family meetings-gather your family once a week to talk about issues, problems or good things in your family. Refer to your mission statement to see how you are doing.
• Remember the emotional bank account-similar to a bank account, you can make deposits or withdrawals from each of your family relationships. Make a conscious effort to make meaningful deposits in your relationships. When you make a withdrawal, apologize and correct the mistake.

I am confident as you do these things, you will find your relationships strengthened in your family. You will take control of your life and your family’s life rather than being tossed away by the storms of problems or crises that come your way. Will you try it? See what results you get. What else have you found that helps strengthen your family? I would love to hear from you.

For more ideas on strengthening families you may interested in reading The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families

Join my free social learning community at www.stephencovey.com