As I have been contemplating the struggles that all of us go through in life, I am reminded of this powerful quote by Albert E. N. Gray:

“The successful person has the habit of doing things failures don’t like to do. They don’t like doing them either necessarily. But their disliking is subordinated to the strength of their purpose.”

I invite you to ponder on this idea in your own life. What are the things you know you have to do but are avoiding? If you were to discipline yourself and create a plan for doing those things, would you find positive, even breakthrough rewards?

For me, I know when I have avoided doing something, I have eventually seen that I’ve paid an even higher price by avoidance. For example, when I neglect my health by not eating right, exercising, or getting enough sleep, because I find it hard to stick to a disciplined regiment, I find myself feeling sluggish and not doing my best work. When I finally subordinate my dislikes to the strength of my purpose, things turn around.

I challenge you to contemplate your life and identify something you are avoiding and make a promise to yourself that you will do it. Make a promise and keep it. Subordinate the things you dislike doing to your greater purpose. I am confident that you the more you do this, the more strength you will build-and the more success you will find. What have you been avoiding? What is the end result you would like to see in your life?

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The only way to enjoy an experience is to actually be there for it, mentally as well as physically. I’ve been at high school football games where every parent in the stands is “there” physically, but thumbing away on their Blackberry. Guess what?  Everybody, including the kid you’re there to watch, knows you aren’t “there.” And how much fun are you having? You didn’t see the spectacular catch at the 10 yard line or the cheerleader stunts on the sidelines. You didn’t smell the hot dogs or feel the breeze.  You sat in the car taking a call during halftime and missed the high school band version of Led Zeppelin hits.  But hey, you were “there.”

I know, I know, you’re already trying to eat right, exercise, and get enough sleep, all while leading in the workplace, your family, and the community, and now I’m telling you that you must actually be mentally present for all of that? Yes. What difference does it make what you’re physically doing if you’re not experiencing it? 

Unfortunately, being mentally present is no easier that staying physically fit.  It takes effort. In its natural state, your mind operates much like a car radio on “scan.” It plays a little bit of one station then goes to the next station, jumping about from one song to the other.  Another way to think about it is your mind is like a stream, always rolling along from one thing to another. If you stay on the surface of the water, when the winds pick up, you will be rocked about with the rapids. But if you have invested the time necessary to focus your mind, to remain present and focused, when the winds come you can dive to the deepest part of a pool, down deep where everything is still despite the rapids on the surface. And you’ll actually experience things!   

Executive Mamas recognize it requires tremendous discipline to maintain mental focus on the present moment and they work at it.  A couple of resources I’ve found particularly helpful (not endorsed by FranklinCovey Company, simply recommendations from Jennifer Colosimo among the many existing options) are books, audio, and practices taught by Eckhart Tolle and Eknath Easwaran.      

Author: Jennifer Colosimo, Vice President of Sales and Delivery Effectiveness at FranklinCovey

They are busy people but luckily they take time to share their thoughts with us via blogs. Check out some of their insights:

Kory Kogon

Here’s what I know:  I am able to sleep at night knowing I am putting the big rocks…the MOST important things first. …Whether it is your team, your peers, your family….don’t let the small rocks fool you. Don’t let your ego overwhelm you…take the time to consider your values and the “most important”. Don’t let the urgency of the day to day cause you to regret later on…If you need help with figuring this out….take a Focus: Achieving Your Highest Priorities class….that may be just the “big rock”  you need to come to terms with what’s important in your life.

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James Cathcart

One of the challenges of (life) is to not allow these stresses and strains to get the better of us, (but instead) to endure the varied seasons of life while remaining positive, even optimistic. Perhaps when difficulties and challenges strike, we should have these hopeful words of Robert Browning etched in our minds: “The best is yet to be.”

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